A Mother’s Day Challenge
Greetings friends! I just finished up a wonderful weekend of ministry in Oklahoma City. Well, I was actually in Moore, OK . . . the site of last May’s deadly tornado. It was an honor to minister to the people I have prayed for so often! It was also an honor to minister to the widows and widowers of their area! Such wonderful people! Thank you to Dr. and Marsha Harvey! Without the two of you none of it would have been possible!
I made many new friends and can’t wait to go back!!!!!
Today, I am burdened to issue a challenge! It is actually with fear and trepidation that I come to you – fear of sounding like I’m looking for a pity party and trepidation that you may think I’m bragging. I am doing neither . . . simply trying to give you food for thought and initiate action!
This Mother’s Day I wonder if you would consider adopting a single mom – or maybe I should say – her children? Have you ever thought about the fact that single moms buy their own presents? Have you ever wondered WHO takes her children Mother’s Day, birthday, Christmas shopping?
For years now, I have been a single parent who has had to buy all my own presents. This really is NOT a pity party . . . it is my hope that I can enlighten some who have never been challenged to think this way. But definitely, this is not a pity party.
Surely I digress.
Anyhow – One of the toughest parts of being a single parent, particularly a widow (because there simply is NO other parent to even think about or help with things like this), is that when holidays roll around you are caught in a conundrum. The selfless thing to do would be to say that you don’t need any presents. But, there-in lies the problem . . .
In my marriage – Chad always took care of making sure I had gifts. He took the kids shopping, he purchased the gifts, and he made sure our kids were taught to think about others. That is all part of the process of gift giving. Since he’s been gone, the easiest thing to do would have been to simply say that ‘Mama doesn’t need a present.’
But then, what about teaching these precious children the importance of honoring their mama . . . or daddy . . . whichever it may be? What about teaching them to think outside of themselves?
This is where the conundrum lies!
Now a bit of perspective into a widow’s heart (and I suspect ANY single parent’s heart) ~ the reality of holidays alone is that they just drive the pain deeper. It is a reminder of loss. Of broken dreams. Of what isn’t. I often say that in one of the toughest parts of grief is that you are robbed of ever again having a holiday that is pure joy. No, holidays and special events are forever seasoned with pain. Think about it . . . Abbi is about to have senior prom and graduation. While we won’t dwell on it, someone will be person missing and no matter how hard you try to ignore it . . . the pain . . . the gaping hole . . . will be there. For a single mom, going without and pretending you really didn’t want anything often seems less selfish.
Now! What would happen if we each considered the single parents we know . . . and adopted one??? What a blessing we could be!
Last year, just before Mother’s Day, a friend of mine lost her husband. As I prayed about how to minister to them, it occurred to me. I took those sweet boys who had just lost their daddy, Mother’s Day shopping. They had NO idea what their mom liked . . . her favorite colors, favorite candy, etc. Nope. Their dad had always done that and they had simply tagged along. So, we talked about ways they could watch their mama now . . . how to pay attention to the things she likes and her ‘favorites.’ By the time Christmas rolled around when I took them shopping again . . . they both had been paying attention and were SO excited to pick out the things they thought she would like. It blessed them to bless her. And boy-oh-boy did it bless me!
Both times my friend offered to pay. I refused. It’s no fun to buy your own presents!!!!!
So, do YOU know a single parent? Someone you can bless?
I can already hear someone saying, ‘some single moms have put themselves in that position.’ Maybe. But what would Jesus do? I tell my kids all the time that God calls me to love . . . not judge. He can handle the judging all by Himself! Besides, if God blessed based on worthiness . . . we would all be going to Hell.
So how about if we take a lesson from our sweet Lord? How about if we offer grace and mercy and bless a Mama this week JUST BECAUSE WE CAN!!!!!! I know that in the end – YOU may be the one who receives the greatest gift!
The highlight of MY Mother’s Day this year? This Thursday I will spend a couple hours with two fabulous boys and together we will bless their wonderful Mama who deserves SO much love! I can’t wait!!!!!